Question 397/413
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Hello Anzol, I am not a russian speaker, but I find your channel very useful.
The situation is like this:
We are together for almost two amazing and great year when it comes to sex. Everything else is perfect in the relationship, even surprised that two people can be such good matches for each other. But there is one point in which things are not clear, or maybe problematic.
She admitted that she cannot reach an orgasm with me, but she did have it with other men, or ex boyfriends. At the same time she told me not to get bothered by this fact and that she has a great time with me anyway. In her previous relationships she always had boyfriends who were dominating and she enjoyed being used (for sexual pleasure). And in situations where this did not happened, she was cheating.
In the beginning of our relationship we discussed that sex is a very important part of relationship, or even to us as humans, not even related to relationship or to each other, and that we are free to even pursue pleasure outside of the relationship.
For me this point was very important because I always wanted a relationship in which sex can also be just sex, and can be done with other people, since our bodies should be utilized to their maximum potential for the short time we are on this earth. And I also explained to her that I have very strong desire to being a cuckold in the relationship, which she understood and accepted.
Sometime has passed since we had the discussion about orgasm, but slowly, our sex experiences are getting more.. flat (boring could be too strong word for it).
So now I'm left with this problem. She does not seem to want to meet another man just for sexual satisfaction, and she also does not have an orgasm in the relationship with me.
My question is:
What can be done so that sex life doesn't completely become useless experience, for my side, giving up the cuckold desire, and for her side never having an orgasm.
Thank you.
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hi. thanks for the question in english. this is the first time for me, answering in english.
It’s not really clear for me, what you want to find out, but I will try to help you.
as far as I understand, your problem is that you want to be cuckold but she doesn’t want it and the second problem is that she doesn't have an orgasm with you but you want her to have it with you.
the easiest way to solve both problems is to change your partner. tell your new partner what you want and how you want it.
If you decide to stay with your present partner, notice that she is satisfied. you seem to try to impose her your view of the world.
for you it is good when she has an orgasm and you don’t consider that she is ok with it. maybe if you stop waiting for her orgasm and insisting on it she will be able to orgasm.
anyway, her orgasm is not your responsibility, it is only her who is responsible for her pleasure and you are responsible for your pleasure.
how can you cope with your desire to be cuckold? find a new partner who will like it. if you are still ready to try one more time to find an approach to her, talk to her.
ask her: are there any conditions you can play cuckold with me? if there are, tell me about them.
have in mind, if she answers “no”, it is worth stopping your communication on this topic and thinking how you will solve your problem by yourself, without involving her in this process.
pay attention to the context. the place and the atmosphere where you have sex.
her orgasm, your pleasure mostly depend on the context, surrounding your sex.
do you want her to cum with you? pay attention to the atmosphere and change something if it is possible.
do you want pleasure from sex? pay attention to emotions, take care of feelings and sex will be much better.
i think you can start fantasizing or ask her to create stories about having sex with other people.
during sex or before it imagine in details how she is having sex with another man, i think this will help you.
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